Reverend Jean always says "The Universe will give you what you ask for tenfold". If you stop paying attention after that because you are so amped to ask the Universe for stuff to come back to you, you'll miss the second and most important part which is, "so be careful of what you ask for".
Seems like the good Rev brings some common sense to her sermons so why is it that I don't heed these words when I'm praying for all those things I want to come to me tenfold? Well, I had a conversation with a buddy of mine and he informed me right before I called him that he was talking to another buddy about how to pray.
His advice was simple. He broke it down for me in a few steps:
STEP 1: Be Very Specific
I tend to ask the Universe for the baseline needs. Case and point, right now, I need money so it makes perfectly good sense that I ask just for money (I guess to do with what I please but in all seriousness, I just want to get the bills right). He said I should ask for what I want and for what reasons I want it so that the Universe won't just give you one but not the other.
STEP 2: Don't Ask for Too Much
I will speak for myself in saying that I usually fall into the trap of asking for everything in one sitting as if I'm never gonna pray again. That's probably because I don't pray enough. I feel like I have to get it all in. He said the Universe will only respond to what you ask for sincerely, so coming to it with a Christmas list of needs or desires will only muddy the waters. Fair enough. At this point I was beginning to get the picture.
STEP 3: Listen When the Universe Speaks
I know for a fact that I have a problem with this. For now I will blame my short attention span but I'm sure there are some clear and direct signs the Universe is putting down that I'm not picking up. I heard about this stuff called "meditation" that's supposed to do the trick. Apparently when you meditate, you allow yourself to become closer to the Universe; you allow yourself to hear the Universe speaking to you; you awaken to what you really need to see or understand. This is where I'll blame my short attention span...whenever I set my mind to meditate, after about a minute or so, I begin to see Dave Chappelle dancing with goat legs replacing his regular limbs. I'm certain this is not what the Universe is trying to tell me.
Finally, he said its better to pray for the Universe to enact a change in you rather than a change in your circumstances. He finished by reinforcing the point that you (generically) can have what you ask for but that the vehicle for whatever change you desire is you.
I'm going to put these words into action to see what comes of it. I ask that ya'll pray for me but remember the rules above.
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
Tuesday, November 29, 2011
Swagger...
Some people have it...
Some people don't...
Some people talk about it ad nauseum but really don't understand it...
Some people live it...
and then some...
Post over.
Some people don't...
Some people talk about it ad nauseum but really don't understand it...
Some people live it...
and then some...
Post over.
Sunday, November 27, 2011
What to Do When There's No More Fight Left in You?
For me and people wired like me, the answer is...KEEP ON FIGHTING.
This lesson was made ever more clear in the months leading up to the 2011 IBJJF Pan Am Championships when our coach put the team through what we called "Death Workouts". These workouts consisted of 30-40 minutes of BJJ related drills back to back and in rapid succession and usually involved some type of running or calisthenic component prior to completing the drills followed by 30-40 minutes of live sparring with no breaks, no water, no nothing...except maybe death. And if you weren't dead (a fate none of us met thankfully) you certainly wished for a second that you could just stop feeling for a moment and the pain would be lifted from your body (or your mind depending on which tenet you ascribe to).
So now when faced with a real world situation where I am in the fight of my life, I am thankful I am conditioned to keep fighting. Had I not endured those months of what seemed like torture, I would not have the resolve to keep getting up despite being knocked on my ass of the umpteenth time. I would have quit. I wouldn't be here still fighting today. I don't have the comfort of the mats or the shared experience of my teammates now. I have to deal with these matters alone, without the comforts of the gym to console me, wipe off my tears or supply a soft place to land. There's just me and my opponent...one of us will be vanquished when its all said and done
The theme of today seems to be gratitude. In lieu of the Thanksgiving Holiday and all the talk of thanks over it, what I missed was gratitude for little things like being above ground, being given the opportunity to be a better me than the me who woke up this morning. I can't forget these little things as I trudge along through my life settling differences with the Universe on what now seems like a daily basis.
What I have come to learn is the Universe has a strong side control, is deadly with collar chokes and might knock you into next week if you're not paying attention.
This lesson was made ever more clear in the months leading up to the 2011 IBJJF Pan Am Championships when our coach put the team through what we called "Death Workouts". These workouts consisted of 30-40 minutes of BJJ related drills back to back and in rapid succession and usually involved some type of running or calisthenic component prior to completing the drills followed by 30-40 minutes of live sparring with no breaks, no water, no nothing...except maybe death. And if you weren't dead (a fate none of us met thankfully) you certainly wished for a second that you could just stop feeling for a moment and the pain would be lifted from your body (or your mind depending on which tenet you ascribe to).
So now when faced with a real world situation where I am in the fight of my life, I am thankful I am conditioned to keep fighting. Had I not endured those months of what seemed like torture, I would not have the resolve to keep getting up despite being knocked on my ass of the umpteenth time. I would have quit. I wouldn't be here still fighting today. I don't have the comfort of the mats or the shared experience of my teammates now. I have to deal with these matters alone, without the comforts of the gym to console me, wipe off my tears or supply a soft place to land. There's just me and my opponent...one of us will be vanquished when its all said and done
The theme of today seems to be gratitude. In lieu of the Thanksgiving Holiday and all the talk of thanks over it, what I missed was gratitude for little things like being above ground, being given the opportunity to be a better me than the me who woke up this morning. I can't forget these little things as I trudge along through my life settling differences with the Universe on what now seems like a daily basis.
What I have come to learn is the Universe has a strong side control, is deadly with collar chokes and might knock you into next week if you're not paying attention.
Saturday, November 26, 2011
I Got Windmills, Yo
Not these windmills...
these windmills
I don't know why but for some time now, I have had windmills on my mind. This may also have something to do with my unyielding desire to improve at arm balances. Ya'll might not know this about me but when I was I child (circa '84 -'86) I was quite the little breakdancer. I earned the handle L-boogie (yes, Lauren stole it from me) from my crew. We never set out to be the best dance crew but we'd break for hours in the park and in each others homes, then break bread with each others families, then go back out to the park to play until the street lights came on.
I don't have many recollections of the battles themselves but I do remember just how liberating it was to do a windmill for 30 seconds, FREEZE and wait for the crowd to say, "OOOOH". The adult in me realizes this might be bad for my shoulders, hips and surgically repaired back but the little kid in me remembers the freedom well enough to know that no amount of pain could replace the feeling of invincibility once you hit that freeze and ditty bopped back to your crew knowing you served that other kid.
Here are two arm balances I am working on:
Once I get these looking good enough, I will post photos and submit them to Yoga Journal
“It's the heart afraid of breaking that never learns to dance. It is the dream afraid of waking that never takes the chance. It is the one who won't be taken who cannot seem to give. And the soul afraid of dying that never learns to live.” -Bette Midler
these windmills
I don't know why but for some time now, I have had windmills on my mind. This may also have something to do with my unyielding desire to improve at arm balances. Ya'll might not know this about me but when I was I child (circa '84 -'86) I was quite the little breakdancer. I earned the handle L-boogie (yes, Lauren stole it from me) from my crew. We never set out to be the best dance crew but we'd break for hours in the park and in each others homes, then break bread with each others families, then go back out to the park to play until the street lights came on.
I don't have many recollections of the battles themselves but I do remember just how liberating it was to do a windmill for 30 seconds, FREEZE and wait for the crowd to say, "OOOOH". The adult in me realizes this might be bad for my shoulders, hips and surgically repaired back but the little kid in me remembers the freedom well enough to know that no amount of pain could replace the feeling of invincibility once you hit that freeze and ditty bopped back to your crew knowing you served that other kid.
Here are two arm balances I am working on:
Once I get these looking good enough, I will post photos and submit them to Yoga Journal
“It's the heart afraid of breaking that never learns to dance. It is the dream afraid of waking that never takes the chance. It is the one who won't be taken who cannot seem to give. And the soul afraid of dying that never learns to live.” -Bette Midler
Friday, November 25, 2011
Anxiety...And Other Drugs
“Anxiety and desire are two, often conflicting, orientations to the unknown. Both are tilted toward the future. Desire implies a willingness, or a need, to engage this unknown, while anxiety suggests a fear of it. Desire takes one out of oneself, into the possibility or relationship, but it also takes one deeper into oneself. Anxiety turns one back on oneself, but only onto the self that is already known.” - Marc Epstein
This is probably a topic I could go on ad nausea about but I'm not doing that tonight. I just want to introduce anxiety as one of my emotional reasons for starting both BJJ and yoga.
For me, anxiety is that friend you invite to come stay at your house for an extended period of time. In the beginning, everything is fine...you don't even realize anxiety is there because he's following all your rules and being very respectful of your property. As time goes on, you start to see small violations but they go overlooked because to you, "its not that serious". Pretty soon, if left unchecked, anxiety has rung up a 600 dollar phone bill from calling Ms. Cleo and the Party Line, stolen your girlfriend, eaten all the damn Cinnamon Toast Crunch, and despite all your good nature, refuses to leave.
That is about a close a picture I can paint without getting too specific about what happened to me but what I will say is that somewhere along the line, I lost myself and became anxiety's bitch. I can cite several reasons why I started BJJ and most of them dealt with the athletic, competitive side of me. I would tell everyone that I wanted to push myself to my limits, tap into my competitive spirit, become a world champion but not once did I admit I really wanted to let go of my crippling fear of being controlled and saw BJJ as that opportunity.
To this point in my life, I only engaged in team sports so I found ways to blend in and do what my team needed me to do to be successful (as a team). I never stood out as a superior athlete and never wanted too. Even then, I think I was fearful of what it meant to excel and succeed beyond my own imagination. I realize now that was a trap anxiety set for me and I fell in head first. When I woke up I realized I needed to do something...something drastic that would challenge me physically, emotionally and spiritually...something that would extend my boundaries beyond recognition...something that put me up close and personal with my greatest fears. Once and for all, I had to prove to myself just what I was capable of on my own.
I'm not 100% sure how BJJ became the tool to find myself. At first I endured many months of frustration followed by just enough growth to keep coming back followed by more frustration. This pattern kept going on for a while but what I slowly came to realize was my confidence grew, my perception of self improved and my guard came down. I made friends...people I chose to invite into my circle. To that point I was only good at putting up barriers and daring people to jump over them for me. This was the much needed breakthrough I was looking for.
TO BE CONTINUED…
This is probably a topic I could go on ad nausea about but I'm not doing that tonight. I just want to introduce anxiety as one of my emotional reasons for starting both BJJ and yoga.
For me, anxiety is that friend you invite to come stay at your house for an extended period of time. In the beginning, everything is fine...you don't even realize anxiety is there because he's following all your rules and being very respectful of your property. As time goes on, you start to see small violations but they go overlooked because to you, "its not that serious". Pretty soon, if left unchecked, anxiety has rung up a 600 dollar phone bill from calling Ms. Cleo and the Party Line, stolen your girlfriend, eaten all the damn Cinnamon Toast Crunch, and despite all your good nature, refuses to leave.
That is about a close a picture I can paint without getting too specific about what happened to me but what I will say is that somewhere along the line, I lost myself and became anxiety's bitch. I can cite several reasons why I started BJJ and most of them dealt with the athletic, competitive side of me. I would tell everyone that I wanted to push myself to my limits, tap into my competitive spirit, become a world champion but not once did I admit I really wanted to let go of my crippling fear of being controlled and saw BJJ as that opportunity.
To this point in my life, I only engaged in team sports so I found ways to blend in and do what my team needed me to do to be successful (as a team). I never stood out as a superior athlete and never wanted too. Even then, I think I was fearful of what it meant to excel and succeed beyond my own imagination. I realize now that was a trap anxiety set for me and I fell in head first. When I woke up I realized I needed to do something...something drastic that would challenge me physically, emotionally and spiritually...something that would extend my boundaries beyond recognition...something that put me up close and personal with my greatest fears. Once and for all, I had to prove to myself just what I was capable of on my own.
I'm not 100% sure how BJJ became the tool to find myself. At first I endured many months of frustration followed by just enough growth to keep coming back followed by more frustration. This pattern kept going on for a while but what I slowly came to realize was my confidence grew, my perception of self improved and my guard came down. I made friends...people I chose to invite into my circle. To that point I was only good at putting up barriers and daring people to jump over them for me. This was the much needed breakthrough I was looking for.
TO BE CONTINUED…
Thursday, November 24, 2011
Challenge Accepted!!!
As if I needed another challenge in my life, I decided to accept as many challenges thrown my way (and some thrown at others I happened to be in the vicinity of). I usually don't share my writing but I decided to send the link to my blog to my wife (who thought I was hiding it from her) and the first reaction I got was, "you should write more, Lateef" and that began a day of impromptu challenges issued and accepted.
The most important challenge came from my wife who challenged me to write on this blog everyday until Christmas. The rules are:
- blog posts have to be published before midnight
- we have to comment on each others blogs
- if we fail to meet a deadline, we are allowed to "guest write" on each others blogs which is just code for tell embarrassing stories about each other
This seemed fair enough to me since I am always making resolutions to blog more every year (we all see how that has worked out for the past 4 years or so). I just have to keep track of all my challenges accepted so I don't lose sight of my goals for the coming new year. The following is a list of challenges on my horizon:
- Kickboxing match with Tisi
- Arm balance contest with Katie
- blogging every day until Christmas
That is all I can remember for now. I know there will be more because I'm wired like Barney Stinson...wherever there is a challenge issued, if I'm around, I will accept unconditionally regardless of the consequences.
Who knows, this might be the start to a lot of goodwill from the Universe...or a lot of pain for me. Nevertheless, I look forward to any and all takers.
Wednesday, November 23, 2011
Has It Really Been A Year?
This morning I came across www.jiujitsulinks.com and it's plethora of blogs related to BJJ, MMA and the lifestyle thereof and got to wondering what was going on with my blog. Guess what I found? Not a damn thing since last year.
The last time I wrote anything of substance, I was asking the Universe for a bunch of things. Here's what I got:
- Pan Ams Bronze Medal
- Promoted to purple belt
- Lost job (fired for being stupid)
- Found BETTER job (a better emotional fit for me)
- A modicum of spiritual and emotional growth
So I didn't get everything I asked for but I did get some some things I didn't ask for that I am pleased with. What I lost in pay, I made up for in peace of mind and found a calling that finally fits my personality to a tee.
With it being Thanksgiving Eve, I will ask the Universe for a few more things while they are on my mind:
- Financial security
- Even deeper connections with my loved ones
- More face time with my friends
- Become Strength and Conditioning Certified by NSCA
- Never working in an office environment again
- More blog postings
I know there's more but these are the ones that popped in my head. I secretly want to get this blog on www.jiujitsulinks.com but I figured I'd start with a smaller wish like more than one blog posting per year before I suggest it to the site.
The last time I wrote anything of substance, I was asking the Universe for a bunch of things. Here's what I got:
- Pan Ams Bronze Medal
- Promoted to purple belt
- Lost job (fired for being stupid)
- Found BETTER job (a better emotional fit for me)
- A modicum of spiritual and emotional growth
So I didn't get everything I asked for but I did get some some things I didn't ask for that I am pleased with. What I lost in pay, I made up for in peace of mind and found a calling that finally fits my personality to a tee.
With it being Thanksgiving Eve, I will ask the Universe for a few more things while they are on my mind:
- Financial security
- Even deeper connections with my loved ones
- More face time with my friends
- Become Strength and Conditioning Certified by NSCA
- Never working in an office environment again
- More blog postings
I know there's more but these are the ones that popped in my head. I secretly want to get this blog on www.jiujitsulinks.com but I figured I'd start with a smaller wish like more than one blog posting per year before I suggest it to the site.
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